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Our relationship with our responsibility is our relationship with our values.
It is, above all, the way we respect ourselves and others.
When we take ownership of our responsibility, we create the dynamics that will lead us where we want to go—those dynamics that clearly and openly communicate our message to others, to the relationship, and to our stance in life. It’s how we avoid being wronged and avoid wronging others—it’s how we help others understand what we think and feel about them, with respect.
It’s how we communicate who we are.
With this awareness, we build greater stability, because we are in touch with our values, with the space we occupy, and with the expectations others have of us. With our boundaries—emotional and communicative.
It is how we create the conditions for what we desire to happen. How we pave new paths.
Our responsibility is our share in the relationship—our side of the story.
In traumatic relationships and situations—assuming both parties give their consent—owning our responsibility becomes a healing act.
The more I become aware of the power of my responsibility, the ways and invitations through which I co-shaped the relationship and the events, the less I feel that something just happened to me, or that something was done to me with no control on my part. The less I feel like a “victim,” and the more I feel like a participant in a painful situation, the smaller the trauma seems—because new narratives arise, ones with more responsibility and presence in the experience.
